Cam, I would ask how you’re doing, but I think the answer is too obvious for such a question.
Listen, I know you’re rookie and things are new and overwhelming to you at the moment, but I think I need to explain how this Take No Prisoners prognostication thing works. Each week, I open up my picks, highlighting NFL moments that are rare, widely or narrowly discussed, depending on importance. Because you have passed of over 400 yards in successive weeks, I can’t help but acknowledge you once again.
What you’re doing is unprecedented, but you can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep throwing for a ridiculous amount of yards, monopolizing TNP real estate. That’s selfish bruh! In no way am I speaking against your success, but this can’t be a weekly thing. With your 854 passing yards thus far, you’re on pace to throw for over 6,800 yards. Whatever remarkable this you do from this point on won’t go ignored, but you can’t be the focal point for the entire season.
Now that Cam and I have possibly reached an understanding, let’s get back to what draws the football fans to TNP, shall we:
Bills over Patriots– While New England has lit up the scoreboard in successive weeks, its pass defense allows 381 yards per game, which is next to last. I’m not ready to say Buffalo is for real yet, but I’ll say they’ll pull off my upset of the week.
Panthers over Jaguars– It’s funny to view Carolina as a pass first offense. Thanks to the aforementioned subject matter and the shockingly quiet play of DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart, Carolina’s offense has a new identity. It is that very reputation that will earn the Panthers their first win.
49ers over Bengals– San Fran is looking to rebound from its collapse in week two.
Browns over Dolphins– In this battle of young quarterbacks, I’ll give the “Dawg Pound” the edge on the strength of offensive and defensive physicality.
Lions over Vikings– There is a shifting of the guard of sorts in the NFC North. The team that was once its division’s floor mat, has blossomed into formidable foe. The other is in transition, which leaves us to “Ponder” on the eventual debut of its rookie quarterback.
Texans over Saints– If you think Wade Phillips hasn’t made an immediate impact in H-Town, think again. Houston’s defense is first in stopping the run and pass. New Orleans normally plays well at home, but traditions can be altered.
Giants over Eagles– I don’t know the certainty of Michael Vick’s playing status, but I do know the matchup of offensive line vs. defensive front works in Big Blue’s favor. New York takes one in Lincoln Financial!
Titans over Broncos– I’m taking the older, yet more reliable Matt Hasselbeck over Kyle Orton.
Raiders over Jets– I like Run DMC’s chances against Gang Green. He’s averaging 150 yards per game and is doing so with ease. The absence of Eric Mangold will open the floodgates for Oakland’s front seven to attack New York’s backfield.
Chargers over Chiefs– When it rains, it pours! As if losing Jamal Charles thanks to a season ending injury wasn’t enough, Kansas has the misfortune of playing a San Diego team fresh off a loss.
Rams over Ravens – You waylay Pittsburgh one week, then get doubled-up by Tennessee the next…who expected Baltimore to be this complex? St. Louis has been more competitive than the point margins in their losses suggest. The NFC representatives from the Show-Me state earn their first win.
Cardinals over Seahawks– With some stumbling blocks in his 2011 campaign, Kevin Kolb is trying to prove his brief productivity in Philadelphia was not temporary, while Beanie Wells is trying to become a legitimate running back.
Buccaneers over Falcons– A lot of talk revolves around the Falcons and Saints when it comes to NFC South Supremacy. It’s too early to crown a champion now, but Tampa Bay is out to make a name for itself. What better way to do it than beating a division foe and favorite at home?
Steelers over Colts– The collapse of the 2011 Indianapolis Colts should fall on the shoulders of this team’s front office. They got too comfortable with Peyton Manning, and as a result, could suffer for not addressing the quarterback need sooner.
Redskins over Dallas– DeAngelo Hall, instead of focusing on Tony Romo’s ribs, focus more on the task at hand.
In week two, I went 9-7. It’s time to elevate from here. We’ll get into it again next week.
By Antoine Hoffman